What To Do & How To Handle When Things Don’t Go As Planned
Have you ever had a dream only for it to fall through? Have you ever set a goal that you were never able to reach? This could be something as simple as going on a date that someone bails on or as major as losing the perfect job after going to school for four years to attain it. Because I have! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve made amazing plans for them to get completely obliterated. I’ve had countless dreams that never came to fruition, and I’ve imagined hundreds of awesome ideas that never saw the light of day. I’ve attempted to recreate so many drool-inducing Pinterest meals for them to come out like absolute shit (and yes, I followed the recipes). I planned to get my Master’s Degree and become a college professor of English, and now I’m freelance writing full-time with a Bachelor of Arts and a few years of digital marketing experience.
What do you do and how do you handle when things don’t go as planned?
What happens when something you’ve envisioned working out and lasting forever -- whether it’s a relationship, a career path, or a project -- doesn’t work out or last at all? How do you handle the redirection and the possible disappointment that comes along with it? My best friend just started her last semester of college this week. It’s almost been five years since I graduated college… which is what’s got me thinking about this very topic -- how some things really don’t go according to plan, no matter how hard you try to plan it out. As I was finishing my BA in English in 2014, I had planned to continue my education at SUNY New Paltz in order to achieve my career goal as a college professor of English. By May, I was officially enrolled to earn my Master’s Degree and work as a TA teaching freshman English literature classes. By June, I registered for and scheduled my first semester’s classes and signed the lease on a beautiful home five minutes away from campus with really cool roommates. I was literally all set. On July 14, the last day I was due to lock in my student loans, I pulled out of grad school. According to Maryville University’s website, “Tuition can exceed $30,000 at private colleges and $20,000 at public institutions per school year. Textbooks and supplies also figure into the total expenditure required to get a college degree.” No, thanks. So, yeah, I didn’t choose to continue my schooling elsewhere because I didn’t want to repay loans for the rest of my life after coming out of my BA without any debt. I had no backup plan. My friends from college all had plans to go to local universities to get their MAs and PhDs, and I chose to continue working my bartending job at a local Italian restaurant. Cool. Going to college and earning your degree does not lock you into pursuing a career in the field of your major... Just like putting all of your time, energy, and heart into a relationship does not mean it’s going to last…. Just like spending hundreds of dollars on a fancy camera doesn’t mean you’re going to score a YouTube influencer career. (Yup, I had this dream too.) Plotting out your roadmap to success takes a lot of hard work and dedication. But do we ever account for a backup plan? Or do we just wing it when the wheels fall off? How are we supposed to healthily cope with things when they fall through and there’s no Plan B? It can be hard. But a simple shift in mindset can transform your devastation into redirection toward something more magical than you could’ve ever imagined. I never thought that I would be blogging and writing for a living. I never thought I’d still be single and learning how to love myself at age 26. Back in high school, I literally thought I was going to be a homeowner and married with kids by now... and that is SO not the case. But I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. I really believe that what is meant to be will be. And when one door closes, another door opens. It all works out for the best, even when we least expect it to. I try to convince myself of those things every day to save my sanity and keep my cool, because no matter how hard you plan things out, the truth is that they just might turn out the exact opposite. Out of the thousands of times and hundreds of ways in which my plans have completely derailed, I’ve learned so many valuable lessons that I wouldn’t have learned otherwise -- all of which has led me to where I am, who I am, and how I lead my life today. And that’s really crazy to think about. Life is wild and unpredictable, and we may never know why things play out the way they do. But that’s what makes it so interesting. We just have to ride the waves and see where we wind up on shore -- or who knows? Maybe while swimming for dear life we’ll fall so in love with the sea that we’ll never return back to land. We’ll just have to wait and find out. Read Next: 12 Everday Habits That Will Improve Your Quality Of Life
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